2/18/11

Peace

As the sun begins to set behind me and a warm glow permeates our bedroom in heavenly orange light, I am at peace. I am at a rare, untainted peace that only comes when the dishes are put away, when there are stacks of unread magazines to be torn through on a lazy night, when the homework is near completion and when there is a satisfactory number of job applications under my belt. It's a peace derived from productivity.

But it's also a peace that exudes from the people around me - from my kindred spirits who help me shake things off and stay focused. From my girls who remind me, daily, that life is beautiful and crazy and unexpected. From my husband who knows and loves me through it all.

Today at lunch with a friend, we talked about our lives, our passions, our dreams. And as hearts poured over turkey paninis, I couldn't help but just stare at this girl that I love so dearly and take in that moment. I'm trying my darnedest to take in every single second of this year, because I don't have a clue where I'll be in three months (though I know where I want to be). I want to be able to hold on to it all - to call up these friends like I did today and make last minute plans for 10:30 at night. But, in all likelihood, we'll soon be in different states on different schedules, taking more steps toward those dreams that we'd talked about over tea and sugar cookies from a box. Eventually, we'll have babies that need us home and 10:30 outings will be more of a rarity than the norm. And it will be good. It will be beautiful in its own right.

Right now, though, I'm loving these moments of peace and silence that are unique to this time in my life. I will drink in 55 degree days of February and lose myself in Victorian literature. I'll escape to Boston for a day. I'll hug my husband enough to drive him crazy in that hour when my school day has ended and he has yet to finish his last emails of the work day. I will embrace this city of weirdness that we have come to call home. And you better believe I'll be there when my girls need an extra eye on wedding details.

We've had a good eight months, us Walkers. I've had a good 3 1/2 years. And in the next week when I'm spread thin and looking like it, I'll remember the peace. Because it's worth it.


Some past moments. 

No comments:

Post a Comment

I love hearing from you!