Someone recently told me that we can
have it all, but not all at once. There was a time when I wouldn’t believe that
– I do now.
Because having it all means leaving
work at 6 PM, going for runs every day, taking long trips to Europe and seeing
your best friends at least once a month. It means that lunch consists of more than a few
bites of chicken and a handful of popcorn. And that your husband never has to
include disappointed emoticons in his texts when you just can’t see him as much
as you’d like to.
Loving
and living with what we do have is a skill, an ability to recognize what
tremendous blessing we encounter each day with every breath. I have more than
enough. It’s not what I thought it would look like when I was eleven and wild
with dreams about adulthood. In some ways it’s better, though. And most days,
it’s okay.
But yesterday – working late, missing my
husband, missing my dear confidants and wishing maybe more than anything that
I’d eaten a decent lunch so that I could handle my life – becoming a grownup
seemed like the worst possible thing that could ever happen to a person.
So
this is my plea, to my friends who kindly read every word so that they can stay
connected to me in a way that I have not been able to stay connected to them:
don’t stop calling, texting or emailing. One day soon we will stop playing
phone tag.
(Also, I keep photos of all of you on
my desk and sometimes, when no one is listening, I whisper to you. Ok… jokes,
jokes. I’m not that crazy. Yet.)